








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 52 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3794 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,037 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1586 | 31% |
| Smokes | 707 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 1899 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 845 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,399,019 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 186 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scott | 56% | 36 |
| #2 | chronic(weed)ly online | 56% | 36 |
| #3 | walkemdowntroy22 | 54% | 145 |
| #4 | PimpChimp69 | 52% | 25 |
| #5 | i drive | 52% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | walkemdowntroy22 | 35 | 0.0123 |
| #2 | Aninefivesiix | 27 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | blegh | 16 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | chronic(weed)ly online | 7 | 0.0094 |
| #5 | natedogsturdikat | 6 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aninefivesiix | 888 | 0.18 | 19 min |
| #2 | blegh | 186 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #3 | i drive | 123 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #4 | chronic(weed)ly online | 67 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | natedogsturdikat | 65 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scott | +4.60 | 83 | 41 |
| #2 | miwa | +3.10 | 81 | 47 |
| #3 | Aninefivesiix | +2.07 | 73 | 56 |
| #4 | i drive | +0.96 | 75 | 47 |
| #5 | chronic(weed)ly online | -0.10 | 42 | 44 |





