








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 29 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3647 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,894 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2113 | 31% |
| Smokes | 208 | 3% |
| HE Grenades | 3074 | 45% |
| Molotovs | 1499 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,042,429 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 299 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | drip lord chen | 61% | 54 |
| #2 | natedogsturdikat | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | Aninefivesiix | 58% | 60 |
| #4 | i drive | 58% | 95 |
| #5 | miwa | 56% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | miwa | 56% | 36 |
| #6 | blegh | 55% | 121 |
| #7 | walkemdowntroy22 | 53% | 62 |
| #8 | Potuiy | 52% | 54 |
| #9 | PimpChimp69 | 51% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | walkemdowntroy22 | 15 | 0.0121 |
| #2 | i drive | 12 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | Potuiy | 12 | 0.0114 |
| #4 | PimpChimp69 | 7 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | Aninefivesiix | 7 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | i drive | 287 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #2 | Aninefivesiix | 278 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #3 | Potuiy | 242 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #4 | PimpChimp69 | 203 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | blegh | 147 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scott | +4.51 | 84 | 53 |
| #2 | i drive | +2.26 | 75 | 47 |
| #3 | miwa | +1.62 | 74 | 43 |
| #4 | Aninefivesiix | +1.62 | 62 | 58 |
| #5 | drip lord chen | -0.66 | 45 | 49 |





