








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 334 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1775 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,967 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1420 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1039 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 758 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 750 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $360,242 of utility $56 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 568 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lost Boy Joschi | 49% | 49 |
| #2 | ballen wie die lakers Guck | 44% | 45 |
| #3 | Fab1uS | 39% | 122 |
| #4 | Geck | 38% | 24 |
| #5 | LifoS | 37% | 241 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | no_cee | 36% | 22 |
| #7 | sugoi_milkies | 35% | 126 |
| #8 | Ge0rg | 31% | 36 |
| #9 | Weixinator | 30% | 190 |
| #10 | Nize ^-^ | 27% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LifoS | 41 | 0.0088 |
| #2 | Fab1uS | 9 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | ballen wie die lakers Guck | 8 | 0.0095 |
| #4 | Weixinator | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Nize ^-^ | 7 | 0.0077 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LifoS | 608 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #2 | Fab1uS | 362 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #3 | sugoi_milkies | 357 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #4 | Weixinator | 303 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #5 | ballen wie die lakers Guck | 118 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ballen wie die lakers Guck | +4.14 | 77 | 61 |
| #2 | Geck | +4.12 | 68 | 68 |
| #3 | Lost Boy Joschi | +3.93 | 75 | 54 |
| #4 | Fab1uS | +3.13 | 61 | 70 |
| #5 | Nize ^-^ | +0.41 | 48 | 53 |





