








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 509 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5831 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,400 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1203 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2137 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1859 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2201 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,520,952 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 637 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :3 | 63% | 83 |
| #2 | SigmaGrindsetAlpha | 59% | 71 |
| #3 | KAKAKKAKAKKAKAKAKKAKAKKAKAKA | 57% | 83 |
| #4 | Facts | 55% | 119 |
| #5 | LogiC | 53% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | LogiC | 53% | 30 |
| #6 | Mortuss | 53% | 226 |
| #7 | Clapbot | 53% | 49 |
| #8 | Eternal Love | 50% | 239 |
| #9 | Beikenost | 49% | 248 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eternal Love | 25 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | :3 | 12 | 0.0076 |
| #3 | SigmaGrindsetAlpha | 11 | 0.0081 |
| #4 | Facts | 9 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | Beikenost | 7 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eternal Love | 951 | 0.20 | 25 min |
| #2 | KAKAKKAKAKKAKAKAKKAKAKKAKAKA | 367 | 0.21 | 10 min |
| #3 | :3 | 328 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #4 | Beikenost | 269 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| #5 | SigmaGrindsetAlpha | 257 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LogiC | +4.01 | 86 | 70 |
| #2 | KAKAKKAKAKKAKAKAKKAKAKKAKAKA | +3.10 | 83 | 60 |
| #3 | Ornn Main | +2.98 | 87 | 39 |
| #4 | Facts | +1.90 | 79 | 48 |
| #5 | SigmaGrindsetAlpha | +0.53 | 55 | 69 |





