








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 917 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 337 matches | ||
| Faceit | 126 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 72 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5102 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,905 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4262 | 25% |
| Smokes | 4715 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 5363 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2565 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,498,594 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 130 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MissNoAim | 68% | 31 |
| #2 | Dr. Bergwall 慶祝偉大 | 64% | 157 |
| #3 | Sjomppis | 59% | 76 |
| #4 | Lite | 57% | 42 |
| #5 | Luvaludde ❤ | 55% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Lite | 57% | 42 |
| #5 | Luvaludde ❤ | 55% | 148 |
| #6 | challe | 55% | 100 |
| #7 | Gnarly (rico) | 54% | 272 |
| #8 | get_rickt | 54% | 108 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gnarly (rico) | 26 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | challe | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Dr. Bergwall 慶祝偉大 | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Luvaludde ❤ | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | get_rickt | 4 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gnarly (rico) | 780 | 0.13 | 19 min |
| #2 | challe | 311 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | Lite | 299 | 0.30 | 8 min |
| #4 | Dr. Bergwall 慶祝偉大 | 297 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #5 | Luvaludde ❤ | 259 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. Bergwall 慶祝偉大 | +3.02 | 78 | 69 |
| #2 | Lite | +1.70 | 66 | 76 |
| #3 | challe | +1.50 | 65 | 60 |
| #4 | Geniusxl3 | +0.90 | 63 | 63 |
| #5 | Luvaludde ❤ | +0.19 | 48 | 58 |





