








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 101 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 35 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
367 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,732 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 402 | 23% |
| Smokes | 503 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 383 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 444 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $148,239 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 24 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aCos | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | M.4SCHU | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | eNeN :J | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | Aéc | 62% | 26 |
| #5 | R.0xy | 61% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | hArry_- | 58% | 12 |
| #7 | Gundalf | 58% | 33 |
| #8 | Jayzeee | 38% | 8 |
| #9 | Casual Daddy | 30% | 10 |
| #10 | Hd3R | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R.0xy | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | M.4SCHU | 1 | 0.0120 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gundalf | 125 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #2 | Aéc | 113 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | eNeN :J | 92 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #4 | R.0xy | 52 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Casual Daddy | 42 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aCos | +3.22 | 80 | 60 |
| #2 | Gundalf | +2.78 | 89 | 73 |
| #3 | hArry_- | +1.65 | 84 | 73 |
| #4 | Jayzeee | +1.25 | 83 | 51 |
| #5 | Aéc | +0.57 | 83 | 54 |





