








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 208 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 65 matches | ||
| Premier | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5269 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,839 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4903 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3064 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 5099 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 4773 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $547,312 of utility $60 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 106 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lalios | 78% | 124 |
| #2 | Ryn | 77% | 123 |
| #3 | Jnasty | 76% | 159 |
| #4 | Royal Guard | 71% | 56 |
| #5 | i arent think that | 71% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lalios | 7 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Jnasty | 6 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Kur0 | 4 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | Groovi 👀 | 4 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | Ryn | 3 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jnasty | 584 | 0.19 | 16 min |
| #2 | lalios | 407 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #3 | Ryn | 347 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #4 | dao | 235 | 0.31 | 6 min |
| #5 | Aya | 211 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jnasty | +3.36 | 80 | 72 |
| #2 | Islander | +3.32 | 70 | 66 |
| #3 | Blade | +3.11 | 81 | 61 |
| #4 | i arent think that | +2.89 | 67 | 64 |
| #5 | Ryn | +2.67 | 89 | 77 |





