








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1338 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 207 matches | ||
| Premier | 176 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 147 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 45 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 70 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




66 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10827 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,241 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12344 | 34% |
| Smokes | 9876 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6044 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 7977 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,707,098 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3303 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | do you like waffles? | 71% | 58 |
| #10 | Tz | 67% | 58 |
| #11 | Cabbage | 49% | 61 |
| #12 | Shouganai | 47% | 95 |
| #13 | Paul | 38% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Llok6 | 19 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | goJo | 18 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Ryn | 14 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | whiko | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Royal Guard | 10 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | goJo | 1405 | 0.29 | 36 min |
| #2 | Ryn | 1295 | 0.16 | 38 min |
| #3 | Jnasty | 1198 | 0.19 | 35 min |
| #4 | lalios | 1098 | 0.17 | 28 min |
| #5 | whiko | 688 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | goJo | +5.81 | 94 | 77 |
| #2 | Ryn | +3.36 | 86 | 75 |
| #3 | do you like waffles? | +2.40 | 65 | 50 |
| #4 | lalios | +2.02 | 85 | 63 |
| #5 | Jnasty | +1.97 | 77 | 72 |





