








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2111 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 235 matches | ||
| Premier | 221 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 209 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 169 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 154 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 61 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 42 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14910 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 40,665 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 14079 | 35% |
| Smokes | 11455 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 5765 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 9366 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,665,253 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2483 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | goJo | 85% | 421 |
| #2 | whiko | 81% | 206 |
| #3 | Tz | 78% | 124 |
| #4 | Ryn | 77% | 1093 |
| #5 | Jnasty | 77% | 941 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Aya | 76% | 333 |
| #7 | Royal Guard | 75% | 624 |
| #8 | Ike | 74% | 174 |
| #9 | Jervah | 70% | 117 |
| #10 | La Bussi | 63% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Royal Guard | 29 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Ryn | 25 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Jnasty | 15 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Aya | 13 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | goJo | 8 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jnasty | 3296 | 0.19 | 93 min |
| #2 | Ryn | 3073 | 0.15 | 90 min |
| #3 | goJo | 1838 | 0.24 | 45 min |
| #4 | Aya | 1354 | 0.21 | 31 min |
| #5 | Royal Guard | 864 | 0.07 | 17 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | goJo | +3.79 | 94 | 77 |
| #2 | Ryn | +2.99 | 87 | 73 |
| #3 | Jnasty | +2.38 | 79 | 71 |
| #4 | lalios | +1.55 | 80 | 62 |
| #5 | whiko | +1.02 | 89 | 56 |





