








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 193 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
787 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,742 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1009 | 27% |
| Smokes | 758 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1148 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 827 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $429,219 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Bärgarn˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ | 33% | 21 |
| #10 | ✪ YaBoyNiggWard♿ | 31% | 26 |
| #11 | Svanen | 22% | 9 |
| #12 | vicke21 | 19% | 16 |
| #13 | Lund1n | 10% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XVW | 10 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | ✪ YaBoyNiggWard♿ | 9 | 0.0194 |
| #3 | Bärgarn˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ | 5 | 0.0115 |
| #4 | Bqldrick | 4 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | Atém | 4 | 0.0083 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pikaboof | 141 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #2 | ✪ YaBoyNiggWard♿ | 110 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #3 | Bärgarn˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ | 108 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #4 | XVW | 105 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | S L I C K | 80 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bärgarn˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚ | +6.16 | 90 | 60 |
| #2 | Aronsson | +5.50 | 69 | 53 |
| #3 | Pikaboof | +3.54 | 73 | 71 |
| #4 | ✪ YaBoyNiggWard♿ | +0.77 | 75 | 60 |
| #5 | XVW | +0.77 | 72 | 63 |





