








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 648 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 167 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1711 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,238 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2156 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1399 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1767 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1916 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $895,966 of utility $212 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 194 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s1 | 54% | 61 |
| #2 | xi | 53% | 17 |
| #3 | Prism | 52% | 21 |
| #4 | Bunny | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | JáÐêñ« BUY MASARI OR STAY POOR | 47% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Prism | 52% | 21 |
| #4 | Bunny | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | JáÐêñ« BUY MASARI OR STAY POOR | 47% | 59 |
| #6 | StimkyBub | 47% | 34 |
| #7 | deast | 46% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deast | 6 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Bunny | 5 | 0.0105 |
| #3 | JáÐêñ« BUY MASARI OR STAY POOR | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Prism | 2 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | s1 | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | deast | 309 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #2 | s1 | 256 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #3 | JáÐêñ« BUY MASARI OR STAY POOR | 131 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | Bunny | 126 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| #5 | xi | 66 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bunny | +3.12 | 79 | 61 |
| #2 | s1 | +2.12 | 80 | 52 |
| #3 | deast | +1.95 | 86 | 64 |
| #4 | xi | +1.60 | 68 | 61 |
| #5 | Prism | +1.20 | 91 | 56 |





