








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 259 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 1,970 | |
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1503 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,893 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2839 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1784 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1505 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1765 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $219,332 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 354 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TwiSi | 6 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | ANPASSAD URL | 6 | 0.0117 |
| #3 | L1nkzyッ | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | 三明治 | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #5 | ♥DonCrazyEyE♥ | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥DonCrazyEyE♥ | 239 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | L1nkzyッ | 165 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | :)zeezpro(: | 123 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | TwiSi | 92 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | ratSo0 | 67 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :)zeezpro(: | +3.59 | 65 | 68 |
| #2 | ANPASSAD URL | +2.88 | 66 | 45 |
| #3 | fsl | +1.72 | 77 | 64 |
| #4 | SE | +1.44 | 81 | 75 |
| #5 | ♥DonCrazyEyE♥ | -0.30 | 74 | 65 |





