










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
381 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,222 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 201 | 16% |
| Smokes | 353 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 339 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 329 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $168,615 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SE | 62% | 26 |
| #2 | TwiSi | 41% | 37 |
| #3 | :)zeezpro(: | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SE | 62% | 26 |
| #2 | TwiSi | 41% | 37 |
| #3 | :)zeezpro(: | 36% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TwiSi | 4 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | SE | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SE | 104 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #2 | :)zeezpro(: | 70 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | TwiSi | 67 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :)zeezpro(: | +3.76 | 69 | 65 |
| #2 | SE | +2.22 | 85 | 74 |
| #3 | TwiSi | -0.45 | 84 | 60 |
| #4 | 三明治 | -2.77 | 45 | 50 |





