








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 132 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 103 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2299 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,110 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2086 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1730 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1228 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1066 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $251,650 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 159 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Birb | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Icage | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | A.Le Sta | 51% | 81 |
| #4 | Abu mamba | 50% | 16 |
| #5 | securee | 50% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | jones | 44% | 27 |
| #9 | alluD | 43% | 30 |
| #10 | ShadowMoneyWizard | 42% | 26 |
| #11 | juspa ∩ (◣_◢) ∩ | 39% | 28 |
| #12 | Abu Yaseer | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A.Le Sta | 5 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | heinis | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Icage | 3 | 0.0117 |
| #4 | alluD | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | jyrkkä | 2 | 0.0065 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A.Le Sta | 207 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #2 | heinis | 109 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | jones | 103 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | Abu Yaseer | 93 | 0.33 | 3 min |
| #5 | Icage | 70 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Miraley | +2.91 | 87 | 62 |
| #2 | Icage | +2.76 | 83 | 59 |
| #3 | Birb | +2.09 | 84 | 66 |
| #4 | A.Le Sta | +0.60 | 79 | 64 |
| #5 | securee | +0.32 | 41 | 71 |





