








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 177 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1182 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,509 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 786 | 22% |
| Smokes | 940 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 832 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 951 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $345,919 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | juspa ∩ (◣_◢) ∩ | 38% | 29 |
| #12 | Abu Yaseer | 38% | 8 |
| #13 | ckob0lz1 | 36% | 11 |
| #14 | jyrkkä | 33% | 6 |
| #15 | | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A.Le Sta | 6 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | -Miraley | 3 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | ckob0lz1 | 2 | 0.0085 |
| #4 | heinis | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | ShadowMoneyWizard | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | A.Le Sta | 146 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | -Miraley | 111 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | juspa ∩ (◣_◢) ∩ | 85 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #4 | heinis | 79 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Birb | 62 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Miraley | +3.63 | 87 | 65 |
| #2 | Birb | +2.52 | 83 | 66 |
| #3 | A.Le Sta | +1.47 | 78 | 63 |
| #4 | ckob0lz1 | -0.23 | 74 | 59 |
| #5 | alluD | -0.53 | 69 | 57 |





