








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 23 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 175 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1404 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,873 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1837 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1535 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1287 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1214 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $781,177 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 162 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | projarsniper | 49% | 134 |
| #2 | champs that dog | 49% | 96 |
| #3 | BigStepaz | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | Marco Dongavitch | 47% | 59 |
| #5 | John Wilkes Booth | 47% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | BigStepaz | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | Marco Dongavitch | 47% | 59 |
| #5 | John Wilkes Booth | 47% | 36 |
| #6 | Rigby | 47% | 134 |
| #7 | Professional Bill Gates | 42% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Professional Bill Gates | 12 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | projarsniper | 11 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | Rigby | 7 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | John Wilkes Booth | 6 | 0.0080 |
| #5 | champs that dog | 3 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | projarsniper | 289 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #2 | Rigby | 201 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #3 | champs that dog | 173 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | Marco Dongavitch | 139 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Professional Bill Gates | 86 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Marco Dongavitch | +2.33 | 72 | 55 |
| #2 | Professional Bill Gates | +0.28 | 60 | 33 |
| #3 | John Wilkes Booth | +0.27 | 72 | 52 |
| #4 | Rigby | +0.00 | 41 | 52 |
| #5 | Lamp | -0.67 | 47 | 65 |





