








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 51 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3041 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,473 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3631 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2402 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2179 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2261 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $308,574 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 140 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fireboy | 77% | 13 |
| #2 | GKaay | 71% | 24 |
| #3 | Rez | 71% | 17 |
| #4 | troy | 69% | 13 |
| #5 | jacob? | 69% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | WhoShotYa | 59% | 39 |
| #14 | Skiyyy | 59% | 46 |
| #15 | Fizzy | 57% | 21 |
| #16 | MDJ | 56% | 54 |
| #17 | monkle | 42% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | unk | 22 | 0.0171 |
| #2 | jacob? | 16 | 0.0173 |
| #3 | GKaay | 5 | 0.0106 |
| #4 | Fireboy | 4 | 0.0223 |
| #5 | MDJ | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MDJ | 368 | 0.32 | 10 min |
| #2 | jacob? | 226 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #3 | unk | 189 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | GKaay | 171 | 0.36 | 6 min |
| #5 | monsyera | 166 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jacob? | +5.37 | 93 | 55 |
| #2 | Rigby | +4.00 | 94 | 61 |
| #3 | brodyn | +3.64 | 82 | 71 |
| #4 | Fireboy | +3.30 | 81 | 76 |
| #5 | Hossinator | +1.82 | 92 | 72 |





