








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 517 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 192 matches | ||
| Faceit | 184 matches | ||
| Premier | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8316 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,351 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13440 | 40% |
| Smokes | 6773 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 5162 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 7976 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,087,426 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 266 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lethal | 82% | 49 |
| #2 | jacob? | 68% | 44 |
| #3 | Skiyyy | 67% | 33 |
| #4 | chase | 65% | 85 |
| #5 | bennessy | 60% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brodyn | 304 | 0.26 | 8 min |
| #2 | jacob? | 279 | 0.31 | 8 min |
| #3 | chase | 264 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | rileyjay | 220 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #5 | bennessy | 214 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jacob? | +4.99 | 93 | 62 |
| #2 | chase | +4.32 | 92 | 57 |
| #3 | Lethal | +3.91 | 98 | 31 |
| #4 | MDJ | +3.22 | 90 | 75 |
| #5 | brodyn | +2.02 | 78 | 76 |





