








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 361 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 486 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3538 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,897 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2886 | 18% |
| Smokes | 5045 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 4558 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3408 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,899,735 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 207 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JaJaDinks | 63% | 27 |
| #2 | Fade | 54% | 65 |
| #3 | Haunt | 52% | 85 |
| #4 | ;P | 50% | 34 |
| #5 | GenerousPoptart | 49% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | GenerousPoptart | 49% | 61 |
| #6 | Hunter | 49% | 35 |
| #7 | VICtos | 48% | 33 |
| #8 | brimmz | 46% | 50 |
| #9 | ryantactics | 38% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GenerousPoptart | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | ;P | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Haunt | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #4 | Fade | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Hunter | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hunter | 179 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | brimmz | 166 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | Fade | 134 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | GenerousPoptart | 118 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Haunt | 113 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fade | +1.45 | 53 | 52 |
| #2 | Hunter | +1.07 | 74 | 68 |
| #3 | brimmz | +1.02 | 67 | 63 |
| #4 | JaJaDinks | +0.83 | 38 | 67 |
| #5 | VICtos | +0.06 | 30 | 62 |





