








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 91 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 176 matches | ||
| Faceit | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2304 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,532 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4318 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2603 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2949 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2662 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $690,828 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mirai | 56% | 27 |
| #2 | syyze | 53% | 34 |
| #3 | Acnologia #lost | 51% | 35 |
| #4 | spiiKe | 48% | 157 |
| #5 | Miraculix | 47% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | H4xXxo0or1(3)(3)7*swuaag*Gebhart | 44% | 66 |
| #9 | skambi | 43% | 83 |
| #10 | ✪ Felix | 42% | 24 |
| #11 | Oni鬼 | 37% | 114 |
| #12 | Contract Killer | 34% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | alu | 14 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | H4xXxo0or1(3)(3)7*swuaag*Gebhart | 6 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Oni鬼 | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | spiiKe | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | antiside | 4 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | alu | 1628 | 0.25 | 45 min |
| #2 | spiiKe | 645 | 0.20 | 18 min |
| #3 | antiside | 529 | 0.22 | 12 min |
| #4 | skambi | 365 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #5 | Contract Killer | 305 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | alu | +4.64 | 89 | 72 |
| #2 | antiside | +0.40 | 70 | 58 |
| #3 | skambi | +0.36 | 75 | 57 |
| #4 | H4xXxo0or1(3)(3)7*swuaag*Gebhart | +0.20 | 72 | 46 |
| #5 | syyze | -0.02 | 79 | 59 |





