








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 257 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 56 matches | ||
| Wingman | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1805 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,685 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2387 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1806 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1985 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1507 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $557,064 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | sande | 47% | 15 |
| #8 | elkku | 45% | 66 |
| #9 | kace | 44% | 36 |
| #10 | Nysky | 44% | 77 |
| #11 | gnarly | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rebe | 15 | 0.0084 |
| #2 | tumeegod | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | mr | 5 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | Nysky | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | kace | 4 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tumeegod | 851 | 0.37 | 24 min |
| #2 | mr | 307 | 0.31 | 7 min |
| #3 | Nysky | 293 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | rebe | 197 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | Pepe | 195 | 0.13 | 3 min |





