








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 106 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1593 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,957 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1496 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1733 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 448 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 1280 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $794,154 of utility $226 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 126 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knarker | 49% | 51 |
| #2 | WiceT | 48% | 52 |
| #3 | Rawne | 46% | 61 |
| #4 | Vipro | 45% | 11 |
| #5 | Dnl | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Markus | 41% | 56 |
| #7 | 40 Km/h | 33% | 24 |
| #8 | Fegil | 30% | 10 |
| #9 | Kattshit | 30% | 20 |
| #10 | 5Hr1Mp | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WiceT | 6 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | Rawne | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Markus | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Fegil | 2 | 0.0098 |
| #5 | Dnl | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rawne | 159 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | Markus | 139 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | Knarker | 76 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | WiceT | 59 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | 40 Km/h | 52 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Markus | +0.98 | 42 | 55 |
| #2 | HekzER | +0.87 | 42 | 58 |
| #3 | WiceT | +0.20 | 43 | 47 |
| #4 | Dnl | -0.07 | 74 | 41 |
| #5 | Knarker | -0.16 | 66 | 50 |





