








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 65 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1627 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,310 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1751 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1407 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1258 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 894 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $985,800 of utility $214 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓴𝓲𝓽𝓼𝓾𝓷𝓮✤ | 74% | 19 |
| #2 | ⭕⃤ ʍʏɦօʀռʏʊռƈʟɛ- | 67% | 18 |
| #3 | GROLAR | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | L2 | 60% | 20 |
| #5 | D-Law66.シノゲカイ | 55% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Player | 46% | 76 |
| #10 | DarkeLord | 45% | 108 |
| #11 | F1nven | 45% | 94 |
| #12 | DanteMav | 33% | 61 |
| #13 | |G| hellcase.org csgocases_com | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ɗєᴠᴠє ƤƖαуєя ❦ | 18 | 0.0078 |
| #2 | Player | 13 | 0.0078 |
| #3 | DarkeLord | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Ɗαяк_Oяcнєѕтяα ❦ | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | L2 | 3 | 0.0076 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DarkeLord | 595 | 0.26 | 17 min |
| #2 | Ɗєᴠᴠє ƤƖαуєя ❦ | 464 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #3 | Player | 378 | 0.23 | 10 min |
| #4 | DanteMav | 262 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #5 | Ɗαяк_Oяcнєѕтяα ❦ | 247 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ɗєᴠᴠє ƤƖαуєя ❦ | +5.79 | 80 | 68 |
| #2 | Player | +5.48 | 84 | 77 |
| #3 | Ɗαяк_Oяcнєѕтяα ❦ | +2.65 | 69 | 65 |
| #4 | GROLAR | +1.65 | 61 | 63 |
| #5 | DarkeLord | +1.26 | 58 | 68 |





