








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 167 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1026 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,264 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 391 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1019 | 45% |
| HE Grenades | 303 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 551 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $141,179 of utility $47 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 19 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hot Dog | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | Mr_Snugglez | 54% | 46 |
| #3 | PrimeRib | 54% | 24 |
| #4 | Cartman | 53% | 19 |
| #5 | shabbadoo | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | d!ce. | 50% | 14 |
| #7 | Warlock | 47% | 68 |
| #8 | Dog Fort | 43% | 21 |
| #9 | The OG Breakfast Place | 42% | 64 |
| #10 | Drakedekay | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Warlock | 4 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | The OG Breakfast Place | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Mr_Snugglez | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Hot Dog | 2 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | PrimeRib | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Warlock | 230 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | The OG Breakfast Place | 172 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #3 | Mr_Snugglez | 72 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | PrimeRib | 48 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Cartman | 47 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hot Dog | +5.40 | 77 | 73 |
| #2 | Drakedekay | +3.79 | 83 | 50 |
| #3 | Warlock | +3.50 | 72 | 70 |
| #4 | d!ce. | +2.73 | 82 | 59 |
| #5 | Mr_Snugglez | +1.02 | 46 | 41 |





