








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 628 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 553 matches | ||
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 133 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5949 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,603 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5461 | 19% |
| Smokes | 7343 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 7971 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 7828 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,037,925 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 347 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ャ_Uff_ャ | 57% | 69 |
| #2 | 54m4n | 54% | 37 |
| #3 | muzzle.ok | 53% | 36 |
| #4 | Treasli | 51% | 47 |
| #5 | kyouden 𐕣 | 50% | 189 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | muzzle.ok | 53% | 36 |
| #4 | Treasli | 51% | 47 |
| #5 | kyouden 𐕣 | 50% | 189 |
| #6 | iTaXx' | 50% | 141 |
| #7 | UnderPressure | 43% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kyouden 𐕣 | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | iTaXx' | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | UnderPressure | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | 54m4n | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | ャ_Uff_ャ | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kyouden 𐕣 | 629 | 0.15 | 17 min |
| #2 | iTaXx' | 613 | 0.21 | 18 min |
| #3 | ャ_Uff_ャ | 410 | 0.28 | 11 min |
| #4 | UnderPressure | 108 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | muzzle.ok | 74 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | muzzle.ok | +2.53 | 75 | 64 |
| #2 | iTaXx' | +2.24 | 75 | 53 |
| #3 | ャ_Uff_ャ | +0.29 | 66 | 74 |
| #4 | Filou. | +0.07 | 50 | 64 |
| #5 | 54m4n | -0.09 | 67 | 66 |





