








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 738 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 261 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5557 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,874 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2446 | 15% |
| Smokes | 3698 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 5205 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 4525 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,478,850 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 190 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴉnɓ | 57% | 54 |
| #2 | ArmD. | 51% | 188 |
| #3 | Titan™ | 51% | 484 |
| #4 | Cyans | 51% | 79 |
| #5 | OldMateRocky | 48% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Cyans | 51% | 79 |
| #5 | OldMateRocky | 48% | 61 |
| #6 | Blue123 | 41% | 137 |
| #7 | gui | 40% | 35 |
| #8 | Ned279 | 39% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Titan™ | 42 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | OldMateRocky | 13 | 0.0100 |
| #3 | Blue123 | 12 | 0.0041 |
| #4 | ArmD. | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Cyans | 4 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Titan™ | 1354 | 0.14 | 33 min |
| #2 | Blue123 | 396 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #3 | ArmD. | 356 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #4 | Cyans | 264 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #5 | ᴉnɓ | 220 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OldMateRocky | +3.65 | 69 | 68 |
| #2 | Titan™ | +1.19 | 69 | 58 |
| #3 | ᴉnɓ | +0.95 | 57 | 67 |
| #4 | ArmD. | +0.92 | 70 | 62 |
| #5 | Cyans | +0.80 | 77 | 64 |





