








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 96 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2267 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,089 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2215 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2016 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1190 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1668 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $653,291 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Icarus | 57% | 49 |
| #2 | Woots | 56% | 18 |
| #3 | String Bean | 53% | 101 |
| #4 | Igamealot102 | 52% | 23 |
| #5 | MisfitMason | 50% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Ρ Δ π― ΓΉ π€ | 42% | 111 |
| #10 | dr | 40% | 15 |
| #11 | β£ Dilly | 40% | 48 |
| #12 | tj3y | 38% | 26 |
| #13 | Kr1lla | 37% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bnaugs | 7 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Ρ Δ π― ΓΉ π€ | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | β£ Dilly | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | 1,000 Denials | 3 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | Igamealot102 | 3 | 0.0065 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | String Bean | 498 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #2 | Bnaugs | 384 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #3 | Ρ Δ π― ΓΉ π€ | 271 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | -Icarus | 219 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #5 | 1,000 Denials | 214 | 0.29 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MisfitMason | +2.60 | 76 | 62 |
| #2 | Igamealot102 | +2.32 | 96 | 55 |
| #3 | 1,000 Denials | +1.46 | 79 | 64 |
| #4 | -Icarus | +0.71 | 67 | 66 |
| #5 | Spence | +0.66 | 83 | 72 |





