








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 92 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1477 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,056 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1534 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1706 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1400 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1416 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $186,487 of utility $65 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xeno | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | Mikcsu | 55% | 11 |
| #3 | Ahmo Michclangch | 54% | 13 |
| #4 | HesuPeka | 54% | 95 |
| #5 | Kimmukka | 53% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | kesonjus | 49% | 37 |
| #9 | Stinde HyperX | 48% | 23 |
| #10 | Jaahas | 46% | 13 |
| #11 | Eskon putiikki | 44% | 18 |
| #12 | Honkkari | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | large man | 8 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | Kimmukka | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Honkkari | 5 | 0.0212 |
| #4 | Eskon putiikki | 4 | 0.0112 |
| #5 | HesuPeka | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ee | 305 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #2 | large man | 190 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | kesonjus | 164 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #4 | Eskon putiikki | 134 | 0.37 | 4 min |
| #5 | HesuPeka | 123 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eskon putiikki | +2.13 | 85 | 70 |
| #2 | make | +1.70 | 76 | 63 |
| #3 | xeno | +1.50 | 84 | 58 |
| #4 | large man | +1.40 | 69 | 67 |
| #5 | Stinde HyperX | +0.35 | 83 | 58 |





