








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 249 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
905 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,555 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1370 | 39% |
| Smokes | 884 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 650 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 651 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $249,039 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eQualizer | 60% | 5 |
| #2 | reinika4ine | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | tuomvsp | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | R1chard | 58% | 19 |
| #5 | KARHU III | 57% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tumeegod | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | Pepe | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | elkku | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | mr | 1 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | reinika4ine | 1 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tumeegod | 452 | 0.36 | 13 min |
| #2 | Pepe | 147 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | mr | 99 | 0.35 | 2 min |
| #4 | Nysky | 97 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | elkku | 90 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eQualizer | +3.53 | 74 | 54 |
| #2 | Blöb | +2.92 | 82 | 58 |
| #3 | Papa Sam✫ | +2.47 | 67 | 76 |
| #4 | tumeegod | +1.96 | 59 | 83 |
| #5 | Pepe | +1.70 | 61 | 63 |





