








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 867 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 254 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5510 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,977 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5715 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4918 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 5970 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 5374 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,278,126 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1154 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vernik | 67% | 36 |
| #2 | KaleiJin | 62% | 42 |
| #3 | ivan biskela (jinwoo) | 61% | 250 |
| #4 | emerbee | 58% | 298 |
| #5 | ¿spOoKē¡ | 57% | 212 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | obsolescence | 56% | 271 |
| #7 | TheDurpyOwl | 55% | 91 |
| #8 | Jeff51 | 49% | 45 |
| #9 | Pain Peko | 49% | 35 |
| #10 | I AREN'T THINK THAT | 42% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emerbee | 16 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | ivan biskela (jinwoo) | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | obsolescence | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | ¿spOoKē¡ | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | TheDurpyOwl | 6 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emerbee | 897 | 0.15 | 22 min |
| #2 | obsolescence | 566 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| #3 | ¿spOoKē¡ | 434 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #4 | ivan biskela (jinwoo) | 298 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #5 | Jeff51 | 151 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ivan biskela (jinwoo) | +2.31 | 69 | 61 |
| #2 | bastian06 | +1.77 | 84 | 65 |
| #3 | obsolescence | +1.11 | 70 | 73 |
| #4 | emerbee | +0.83 | 74 | 62 |
| #5 | Vernik | +0.66 | 76 | 31 |





