








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1513 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 593 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 53 matches | ||
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 101 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




88 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10964 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 42,410 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11880 | 28% |
| Smokes | 9695 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 11060 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 9775 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,739,105 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1092 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Go Trade Men | 78% | 65 |
| #2 | the dollar | 75% | 64 |
| #3 | Invest in Antwerp | 69% | 72 |
| #4 | austin | 68% | 82 |
| #5 | Frankfurda | 68% | 125 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Astro | 109 | 0.0202 |
| #2 | spak | 78 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | Nuaj | 68 | 0.0210 |
| #4 | CHRIZZ | 23 | 0.0076 |
| #5 | GATOR | 21 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | spak | 2356 | 0.15 | 56 min |
| #2 | Astro | 846 | 0.16 | 21 min |
| #3 | nate | 720 | 0.09 | 18 min |
| #4 | CHRIZZ | 666 | 0.22 | 16 min |
| #5 | Frankfurda | 621 | 0.25 | 16 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Astro | +3.22 | 91 | 54 |
| #2 | Nuaj | +2.82 | 91 | 57 |
| #3 | Go Trade Men | +2.57 | 72 | 77 |
| #4 | nate | +2.56 | 82 | 50 |
| #5 | AnOn | +2.17 | 86 | 46 |





