








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1038 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 618 matches | ||
| Wingman | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5137 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,378 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2263 | 16% |
| Smokes | 4568 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3764 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3783 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,338,740 of utility $267 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 672 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 🅱️evin | 53% | 51 |
| #2 | marius | 49% | 47 |
| #3 | shrymp | 48% | 145 |
| #4 | Svendsgård | 48% | 110 |
| #5 | Real Eyes Realize Real Lies | 48% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iCantStop | 18 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | MotoMoto | 13 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | shrymp | 13 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | ǝʞᴉǝH | 12 | 0.0074 |
| #5 | Tob | 9 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iCantStop | 678 | 0.11 | 17 min |
| #2 | MotoMoto | 499 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #3 | ǝʞᴉǝH | 303 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #4 | Svendsgård | 289 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #5 | Tob | 275 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | marius | +3.30 | 82 | 53 |
| #2 | Real Eyes Realize Real Lies | +2.07 | 67 | 63 |
| #3 | zelly | +1.85 | 65 | 64 |
| #4 | ǝʞᴉǝH | +1.75 | 84 | 56 |
| #5 | 🅱️evin | +1.28 | 67 | 53 |





