








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
350 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,773 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 483 | 27% |
| Smokes | 475 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 470 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 345 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $71,735 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yÖbi | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | SwooSh | 64% | 36 |
| #3 | AndyB | 61% | 38 |
| #4 | Ke2 | 59% | 27 |
| #5 | Pragmatic | 58% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yÖbi | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | SwooSh | 64% | 36 |
| #3 | AndyB | 61% | 38 |
| #4 | Ke2 | 59% | 27 |
| #5 | Pragmatic | 58% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AndyB | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | Ke2 | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AndyB | 112 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #2 | yÖbi | 76 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | SwooSh | 54 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | Ke2 | 43 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Pragmatic | 31 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yÖbi | +4.51 | 84 | 78 |
| #2 | AndyB | +1.22 | 64 | 68 |
| #3 | Cit | -0.66 | 53 | 73 |
| #4 | SwooSh | -0.88 | 78 | 59 |
| #5 | Ke2 | -1.04 | 49 | 64 |





