








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1 achievement has been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
363 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 675 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 253 | 37% |
| Smokes | 245 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 97 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 80 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $10,468 of utility $12 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | schizoid | 38% | 8 |
| #8 | ASJKHDASIJKDHASWEIKLJURAHAW3EKLR | 38% | 24 |
| #9 | papa | 33% | 3 |
| #10 | Incendiary | 29% | 14 |
| #11 | Feniul | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ASJKHDASIJKDHASWEIKLJURAHAW3EKLR | 75 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | ❤︎ DJ Mystic | 34 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | schizoid | 19 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | Incendiary | 11 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | $5 footlong | 7 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ❤︎ DJ Mystic | +4.93 | 85 | 47 |
| #2 | $5 footlong | +4.81 | 65 | 39 |
| #3 | schizoid | +3.54 | 63 | 34 |
| #4 | ASJKHDASIJKDHASWEIKLJURAHAW3EKLR | +1.61 | 66 | 59 |
| #5 | moosee | +0.41 | 56 | 49 |





