








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 619 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2098 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,921 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3030 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2489 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2300 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2102 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $227,785 of utility $58 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 223 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil kev | 81% | 26 |
| #2 | bazooka | 75% | 12 |
| #3 | Jojj | 63% | 71 |
| #4 | Doss | 62% | 47 |
| #5 | Nathan ✿ | 59% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Doss | 62% | 47 |
| #5 | Nathan ✿ | 59% | 136 |
| #6 | miguelito | 56% | 27 |
| #7 | BanjoGodSword | 55% | 20 |
| #8 | fraudy | 52% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fraudy | 9 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Nathan ✿ | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Doss | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | miguelito | 3 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | Jojj | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fraudy | 445 | 0.22 | 12 min |
| #2 | Nathan ✿ | 353 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #3 | Jojj | 225 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #4 | Doss | 101 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | miguelito | 75 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TEST | +2.60 | 67 | 77 |
| #2 | Jojj | +1.23 | 63 | 62 |
| #3 | fraudy | +0.57 | 66 | 80 |
| #4 | Nathan ✿ | +0.45 | 73 | 61 |
| #5 | BanjoGodSword | -0.36 | 64 | 43 |





