








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 355 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2312 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,194 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2745 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2350 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1888 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2211 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $663,112 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 578 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lil kev | 60% | 48 |
| #2 | brnsy | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | TEST | 59% | 136 |
| #4 | Jojj | 56% | 99 |
| #5 | miguelito | 52% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | miguelito | 52% | 58 |
| #6 | Doss | 51% | 107 |
| #7 | fraudy | 51% | 197 |
| #8 | uiia | 33% | 15 |
| #9 | GetMcFucked | 28% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fraudy | 15 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | TEST | 10 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | miguelito | 5 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | Doss | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | GetMcFucked | 2 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fraudy | 888 | 0.22 | 26 min |
| #2 | TEST | 675 | 0.24 | 17 min |
| #3 | Jojj | 340 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #4 | Doss | 195 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | miguelito | 149 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TEST | +2.79 | 66 | 78 |
| #2 | fraudy | +1.04 | 66 | 80 |
| #3 | Jojj | +0.65 | 65 | 66 |
| #4 | Nathan ✿ | +0.29 | 75 | 61 |
| #5 | brnsy | -0.24 | 63 | 61 |





