








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 208 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1439 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,024 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1242 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1239 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1469 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1074 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $964,045 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 123 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ritari | 51% | 207 |
| #2 | RhodesyO | 51% | 258 |
| #3 | give me what i want. | 50% | 54 |
| #4 | Dig_Ole_Bick | 50% | 88 |
| #5 | EEEERNN | 40% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ritari | 51% | 207 |
| #2 | RhodesyO | 51% | 258 |
| #3 | give me what i want. | 50% | 54 |
| #4 | Dig_Ole_Bick | 50% | 88 |
| #5 | EEEERNN | 40% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RhodesyO | 85 | 0.0169 |
| #2 | Ritari | 65 | 0.0159 |
| #3 | Dig_Ole_Bick | 17 | 0.0097 |
| #4 | EEEERNN | 8 | 0.0083 |
| #5 | give me what i want. | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RhodesyO | 689 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #2 | Ritari | 382 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #3 | Dig_Ole_Bick | 164 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | EEEERNN | 63 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | give me what i want. | 55 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | give me what i want. | +4.65 | 75 | 45 |
| #2 | RhodesyO | +3.85 | 75 | 57 |
| #3 | Ritari | +1.03 | 64 | 54 |
| #4 | EEEERNN | +0.76 | 33 | 43 |
| #5 | Dig_Ole_Bick | -3.06 | 29 | 46 |





