








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 515 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 407 matches | ||
| Faceit | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7801 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,902 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5737 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5669 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3286 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 4210 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,394,981 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 善 | 59% | 108 |
| #2 | Yatoro瑜 | 57% | 42 |
| #3 | 罪 | 55% | 66 |
| #4 | Rain | 53% | 302 |
| #5 | cjxjason | 52% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | . | 50% | 306 |
| #8 | Lichi Del Rey | 49% | 420 |
| #9 | GLaYD | 48% | 509 |
| #10 | Vi. | 47% | 231 |
| #11 | G-MAN | 42% | 169 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lichi Del Rey | 24 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | . | 19 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | GLaYD | 13 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | G-MAN | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Vi. | 7 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GLaYD | 1827 | 0.17 | 49 min |
| #2 | Lichi Del Rey | 1754 | 0.20 | 48 min |
| #3 | Rain | 384 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #4 | . | 357 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| #5 | 罪 | 293 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Muserxu pop | +1.69 | 74 | 52 |
| #2 | . | +1.31 | 64 | 51 |
| #3 | 善 | +1.07 | 66 | 51 |
| #4 | Yatoro瑜 | +0.90 | 73 | 31 |
| #5 | 罪 | +0.38 | 64 | 69 |





