








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 82 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1207 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,939 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 211 | 5% |
| Smokes | 1288 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1235 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1205 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $745,260 of utility $201 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | {rehti}Adios | 68% | 57 |
| #2 | Melooni | 59% | 155 |
| #3 | EKstrs | 59% | 151 |
| #4 | atte | 58% | 172 |
| #5 | jacka | 58% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EKstrs | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Melooni | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | atte | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | jacka | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | {rehti}Adios | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Melooni | 603 | 0.18 | 17 min |
| #2 | atte | 455 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| #3 | EKstrs | 340 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #4 | jacka | 221 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #5 | {rehti}Adios | 87 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EKstrs | +3.61 | 87 | 77 |
| #2 | jacka | +1.88 | 84 | 78 |
| #3 | atte | +0.86 | 82 | 72 |
| #4 | Melooni | -0.09 | 67 | 67 |
| #5 | NervööSP | -0.69 | 71 | 67 |





