








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 483 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 124 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1739 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,308 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3121 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2490 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1482 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2215 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $359,969 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 53 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | darealarmadillo | 64% | 11 |
| #9 | fArt | 63% | 96 |
| #10 | weine | 60% | 82 |
| #11 | skruubz | 56% | 41 |
| #12 | TacoJohn1267 | 55% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wyan | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | TacoJohn1267 | 5 | 0.0123 |
| #3 | weine | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Akashi | 3 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | fArt | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fArt | 636 | 0.31 | 18 min |
| #2 | weine | 323 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #3 | wyan | 305 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #4 | skruubz | 119 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | Akashi | 76 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | weine | +3.34 | 91 | 72 |
| #2 | dinner | +2.51 | 70 | 76 |
| #3 | Benpanzee | +1.95 | 65 | 51 |
| #4 | skruubz | +1.94 | 79 | 74 |
| #5 | donk | +1.36 | 85 | 58 |





