








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 395 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 121 matches | ||
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2743 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,402 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3367 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2657 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1832 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2546 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $902,109 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 422 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Petasse to the Metal | 66% | 29 |
| #2 | kungler_ | 63% | 32 |
| #3 | jajat | 63% | 88 |
| #4 | The G's Plug | 61% | 173 |
| #5 | silent | 59% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Tu veux dla Vodka ? | 50% | 22 |
| #12 | Kantic- | 50% | 24 |
| #13 | STk_ #FROMHELL | 48% | 25 |
| #14 | jveumcopt1 | 48% | 23 |
| #15 | Philly | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jajat | 9 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | zekq_ | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | The G's Plug | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | silent | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | fandewejdene | 4 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The G's Plug | 468 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| #2 | silent | 267 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #3 | zekq_ | 187 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | Kantic- | 148 | 0.30 | 5 min |
| #5 | kungler_ | 118 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | silent | +2.27 | 85 | 64 |
| #2 | Capitaine Cool | +1.99 | 85 | 69 |
| #3 | jveumcopt1 | +1.81 | 86 | 49 |
| #4 | STk_ #FROMHELL | +1.34 | 67 | 52 |
| #5 | The G's Plug | +0.97 | 78 | 70 |





