








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 196 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1429 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,211 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1687 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2256 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1361 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1907 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $410,057 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sunker | 83% | 12 |
| #2 | Sir Gilbert | 69% | 29 |
| #3 | DeStryy | 64% | 11 |
| #4 | Allahu Akbar | 64% | 11 |
| #5 | ✪ keanuS- | 64% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #20 | Brett.io | 34% | 32 |
| #21 | 5ch0lli | 31% | 32 |
| #22 | worstplayer | 31% | 13 |
| #23 | 777_Kewa_777 | 30% | 10 |
| #24 | silvan | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Enno | 4 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | sKeLeTr0n | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Jobbo_Y | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | Yuno | 3 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | IronTony | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brett.io | 331 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | sKeLeTr0n | 272 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #3 | 5ch0lli | 255 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #4 | TRiBAN | 195 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #5 | cabzy | 175 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sunker | +4.12 | 96 | 71 |
| #2 | Allahu Akbar | +3.80 | 86 | 53 |
| #3 | Luis | +3.43 | 85 | 65 |
| #4 | Sir Gilbert | +2.83 | 84 | 58 |
| #5 | SativA | +2.29 | 82 | 65 |





