








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 559 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 163 matches | ||
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3040 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,570 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4480 | 39% |
| Smokes | 2934 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1533 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 2623 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $637,752 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rock | 76% | 17 |
| #2 | dEnZa | 66% | 65 |
| #3 | Marson.exe | 66% | 105 |
| #4 | Finesse. | 66% | 102 |
| #5 | Think | 66% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Think | 66% | 61 |
| #6 | Rednax- | 64% | 130 |
| #7 | Gubi.sh | 61% | 148 |
| #8 | Eniman | 61% | 76 |
| #9 | ✪ Noogey™ | 59% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rednax- | 8 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Finesse. | 8 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | Eniman | 8 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Gubi.sh | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Marson.exe | 6 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gubi.sh | 645 | 0.21 | 15 min |
| #2 | Finesse. | 550 | 0.25 | 15 min |
| #3 | Rednax- | 510 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #4 | Marson.exe | 461 | 0.20 | 13 min |
| #5 | Eniman | 325 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Natsu Hatake - #Boosted & Tired | +3.23 | 90 | 71 |
| #2 | Gubi.sh | +1.16 | 78 | 63 |
| #3 | Rednax- | +0.55 | 83 | 70 |
| #4 | Finesse. | -0.07 | 78 | 71 |
| #5 | dEnZa | -0.12 | 67 | 70 |





