








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
470 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,734 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 504 | 29% |
| Smokes | 442 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 393 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 395 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $193,714 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PantiePollution | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | Rimas | 67% | 12 |
| #3 | PinkBlood | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | IrishAlchemist | 53% | 15 |
| #5 | Xeero | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | CluEleSs | 46% | 61 |
| #7 | Dunmer | 43% | 7 |
| #8 | m5m | 35% | 23 |
| #9 | Man Feelings | 30% | 20 |
| #10 | Mackin | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CluEleSs | 5 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | PinkBlood | 3 | 0.0129 |
| #3 | Man Feelings | 2 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | Xeero | 1 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CluEleSs | 151 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #2 | m5m | 97 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #3 | PinkBlood | 48 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #4 | Rimas | 46 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #5 | Man Feelings | 35 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rimas | +5.65 | 84 | 57 |
| #2 | PinkBlood | +3.31 | 42 | 50 |
| #3 | PantiePollution | +0.94 | 68 | 54 |
| #4 | MadMacs | +0.86 | 48 | 67 |
| #5 | CluEleSs | -0.27 | 52 | 63 |





