








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 10 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
320 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,027 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 287 | 28% |
| Smokes | 338 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 218 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 184 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $282,938 of utility $212 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 35 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IrishAlchemist | 40% | 10 |
| #2 | Dunmer | 31% | 16 |
| #3 | CluEleSs | 31% | 65 |
| #4 | MadMacs | 30% | 20 |
| #5 | m5m | 29% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | MadMacs | 30% | 20 |
| #5 | m5m | 29% | 35 |
| #6 | Xeero | 27% | 15 |
| #7 | Mackin | 25% | 4 |
| #8 | PinkBlood | 20% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CluEleSs | 7 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | PinkBlood | 2 | 0.0099 |
| #3 | MadMacs | 1 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Xeero | 1 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CluEleSs | 150 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #2 | m5m | 149 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #3 | PinkBlood | 32 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | MadMacs | 28 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Dunmer | 16 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PinkBlood | +3.24 | 37 | 61 |
| #2 | MadMacs | +2.27 | 46 | 65 |
| #3 | CluEleSs | +1.23 | 47 | 63 |
| #4 | IrishAlchemist | -0.55 | 22 | 5 |
| #5 | m5m | -1.98 | 31 | 54 |





