








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 586 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Overpass | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6275 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,539 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2256 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2899 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2123 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1261 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,292,792 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 432 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ Lil Hoppe ♥ | 60% | 35 |
| #2 | homersimson01 | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | ChriticalHitzer | 58% | 283 |
| #4 | William | 56% | 36 |
| #5 | Sid | 54% | 125 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Sid | 54% | 125 |
| #6 | jeanmarc_2003 | 53% | 249 |
| #7 | Metal | 50% | 100 |
| #8 | KS# | 49% | 85 |
| #9 | Rindiculous | 45% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jeanmarc_2003 | 54 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | ChriticalHitzer | 36 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | Metal | 11 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | KS# | 11 | 0.0066 |
| #5 | Rindiculous | 5 | 0.0081 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChriticalHitzer | 582 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #2 | jeanmarc_2003 | 328 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #3 | William | 161 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #4 | KS# | 144 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Sid | 82 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RePacked | +4.42 | 88 | 44 |
| #2 | KS# | +1.14 | 68 | 41 |
| #3 | Rindiculous | +0.83 | 71 | 42 |
| #4 | Sid | +0.75 | 59 | 39 |
| #5 | ChriticalHitzer | +0.69 | 79 | 38 |





