








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 384 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




101 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3324 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,409 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2624 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3430 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3140 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2215 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,934,002 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 335 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ Lil Hoppe ♥ | 60% | 97 |
| #2 | William | 59% | 79 |
| #3 | ChriticalHitzer | 58% | 351 |
| #4 | Metal | 55% | 93 |
| #5 | Sid | 54% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ChriticalHitzer | 58% | 351 |
| #4 | Metal | 55% | 93 |
| #5 | Sid | 54% | 112 |
| #6 | RePacked | 53% | 249 |
| #7 | KS# | 52% | 120 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChriticalHitzer | 66 | 0.0098 |
| #2 | RePacked | 31 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | KS# | 16 | 0.0069 |
| #4 | Metal | 12 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | ♥ Lil Hoppe ♥ | 10 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChriticalHitzer | 793 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #2 | William | 362 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #3 | RePacked | 263 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | KS# | 198 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | ♥ Lil Hoppe ♥ | 124 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ Lil Hoppe ♥ | +5.35 | 83 | 43 |
| #2 | RePacked | +5.19 | 87 | 42 |
| #3 | KS# | +3.20 | 67 | 42 |
| #4 | Sid | +2.43 | 60 | 37 |
| #5 | ChriticalHitzer | +2.29 | 82 | 42 |





