








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 321 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Renown | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2142 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,345 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6312 | 34% |
| Smokes | 4948 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4647 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2438 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $221,687 of utility $29 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 826 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChriticalHitzer | 70% | 63 |
| #2 | ♥ Lil Hoppe ♥ | 68% | 25 |
| #3 | jeanmarc_2003 | 59% | 79 |
| #4 | RePacked | 56% | 36 |
| #5 | KS# | 55% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jeanmarc_2003 | 8 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | jack | 6 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | ChriticalHitzer | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | KS# | 4 | 0.0095 |
| #5 | ♥ Lil Hoppe ♥ | 3 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jeanmarc_2003 | 172 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #2 | ChriticalHitzer | 146 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | jack | 75 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | Sid | 53 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | KS# | 45 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ Lil Hoppe ♥ | +9.78 | 87 | 44 |
| #2 | RePacked | +6.41 | 89 | 49 |
| #3 | Sid | +3.47 | 61 | 38 |
| #4 | jack | +3.42 | 86 | 39 |
| #5 | ChriticalHitzer | +2.39 | 84 | 39 |





