








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1012 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 281 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Renown | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 24 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Esplay | 6 matches | 2,033 | |
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 161 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4058 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,970 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3243 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4522 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4645 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2560 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,403,607 of utility $214 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 664 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hebbbebazzzen | 54% | 116 |
| #2 | uteligger | 53% | 75 |
| #3 | Shipper | 52% | 228 |
| #4 | flashwood | 52% | 165 |
| #5 | Veabuen | 51% | 167 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Nilsen | 50% | 164 |
| #9 | rist | 44% | 115 |
| #10 | 1pat | 43% | 111 |
| #11 | Bøybels | 43% | 49 |
| #12 | Rambo Jens | 35% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tore | 24 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | flashwood | 8 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Shipper | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Nilsen | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | rist | 5 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tore | 2854 | 0.36 | 86 min |
| #2 | Shipper | 754 | 0.16 | 24 min |
| #3 | flashwood | 602 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #4 | Veabuen | 387 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #5 | hebbbebazzzen | 353 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Veabuen | +3.22 | 71 | 71 |
| #2 | flashwood | +1.42 | 83 | 73 |
| #3 | Tore | +1.01 | 81 | 83 |
| #4 | 1pat | +0.75 | 74 | 66 |
| #5 | hebbbebazzzen | +0.58 | 69 | 65 |





