








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1214 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 575 matches | ||
| Faceit | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 172 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




205 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8109 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,998 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6526 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6651 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4976 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5845 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,371,444 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 941 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wipeout | 89% | 102 |
| #2 | cLoudzehh^- | 82% | 56 |
| #3 | Jaysling | 79% | 319 |
| #4 | Nzk | 78% | 54 |
| #5 | Lepep | 75% | 341 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Lepep | 75% | 341 |
| #6 | .Rain. | 75% | 101 |
| #7 | GhostfreaK | 71% | 160 |
| #8 | prime sydney sweeney | 64% | 89 |
| #9 | ☭oceanpuller☭ | 64% | 118 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaysling | 83 | 0.0125 |
| #2 | .Rain. | 49 | 0.0228 |
| #3 | Lepep | 40 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | Nzk | 26 | 0.0239 |
| #5 | wipeout | 21 | 0.0097 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaysling | 1754 | 0.26 | 48 min |
| #2 | Lepep | 977 | 0.14 | 25 min |
| #3 | cLoudzehh^- | 587 | 0.39 | 19 min |
| #4 | wipeout | 525 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| #5 | GhostfreaK | 465 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wipeout | +3.89 | 89 | 66 |
| #2 | Jaysling | +3.03 | 82 | 62 |
| #3 | pepo | +2.65 | 66 | 59 |
| #4 | Lepep | +2.57 | 73 | 63 |
| #5 | cLoudzehh^- | +2.34 | 86 | 79 |





